Yellow Lights Threaten to Go On Strike in Maine

Maine Governor Paul LePage, in a hastily called news conference, has just announced that traffic signals throughout the state are in jeopardy of losing the service of their yellow lights. This disruption would be due to a work stoppage threatened by the middle lights on the traffic pole because they are unhappy with not being mentioned in the popular children’s game “Red Light, Green Light, 1,2,3!”

Governor LePage, who isn’t the brightest bulb himself, said the following at the news conference: “I would imagine there are about one million traffic lights in Maine, so this would be an enormous problem that the Department of Transportation really needs to handle immediately. Please direct all questions to them.”

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