Terrorism Weekly Puts Justin Bieber on Cover (Fiction)
Terrorism Weekly, the magazine of choice for hatemongers and terrorists all over the world, stunned its subscribers today when the latest issue hit the stands. For some bizarre reason, Canadian pop star Justin Bieber was the cover boy.
Needless to say, the mag's readers were infuriated.
This Modern Philosopher was able to track down the publisher to ask him what was behind his decision to put a photo of a person totally unrelated to the mag's usually content on this week's cover.
"This was a direct response to what Rolling Stone did with its cover," he answered after insisting that I not use his name in my article. "They thought they could steal away my regular readers with their sensationalism? Well, I can give them a little taste of their own medicine! I will steal their subscribers and line my wallet with rock and roll loving cash."
But reader backlash has been over the top. Doesn't he fear repercussion? "I might have misread my subscribers," he admitted after a long pause and a heavy sigh. "I thought they would get the irony, see that I was thumbing my nose at the biased American press, but I guess those subtleties were lost in the translation..."
According to multiple news outlets, Terrorism Weekly readers the world over have been holding massive magazine burnings to torch the latest issue. While the protests have been on the peaceful side thus far, the magazine's publisher has gone into hiding to ensure his safety.
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