This really is too funny! Someone purporting to be Dave Dombrowski, the President of the Boston Red Sox placed a Craigslist ad in Boston under general merchandise, "Looking to move overweight third baseman". The description... Just hysterical!

Overweight Third baseman for sale or trade. 5'11 290. Willing to eat most or all of current contract. Willing to hear offers from National league teams, American League Central or West, independent leagues, Chinese, Japanese, or Korean leagues, Any South American or Carribean Leagues, and Most Co-Ed Softball leagues. Warning: offer to eat the salary of the contract does not include cost to feed this man. Take at your own risk. Also if you have a daughter, please take the extra steps to block him off Instagram on her account before adding to your current roster.
Would also trade for a used car (rust is fine, doesn't need a steering wheel), a goat (in which I can flip to the Cubs), partially used Marlboro gift cards (I still owe Jim Leyland), or someone to volunteer to teach Moncada English.

If interested, please call (617)226-6000 and ask for Dave.

 

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